WE LIVE IN GARAGELAND

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!

Dave,

I think they finally removed me as a moderator of the Yahoo Benelli Group, I have no problem with that. Somebody else will be approving or disapproving new members, and moderating spam -- that's basically what a moderator does. It's an easy job, and maybe the NEW moderator will love those homely DeTomaso ("Honda-Engined") Benellis more than I do!

Where I come from, everyone has the right to their opinions and tastes. These folks really hate me because I don't love their lumps, and no amount of attacks or "threats of exclusion/ostracism" can make me change my mind. Maybe these guys didn't realize, until they saw my blog anyhow, that I can fight back, too. You know, I'm not perfect by any means, but I do have pretty good taste, generally speaking. I live in a beautiful house, have a beautiful girlfriend, and own a bunch of cool, beautiful bikes. What, me worry?

Did I ever tell you how I got tossed out of a BMW rider's group? It's a long story, but boiled down, some guy wanted to sell his motorcycle repair business and wasn't successful, so he decided to run a "lottery." You bought tickets and the winner won the business! I thought about it for about 5 minutes and realized that the whole thing could easily be fixed, he could have already picked out a silent partner who was "guaranteed to win" and that everyone who bought tickets could just be getting ripped off.

I suggested this possibility to the group and everyone crucified me, how dare I suggest that there was a possibility that the whole thing wasn't honest, what the hell was wrong with me, blah blah blah. This is where I first saw the "Pack Wolf" mentality at work -- I was like a deer getting attacked by a bunch of starving rabid jackals, hell-bent on having my hide!

Anyway, a few weeks later the Attorney General of the State of New Mexico wrote the guy a letter and told him he'd better shut down the lottery because there was no means of oversight and no way to guarantee that the whole thing would be above-board. In other words, exactly what I said; I was perfectly correct in my analysis. Not only that, but the owner of the business has since done very well (must be the high gas prices, because he's not so great), and so in retrospect he was glad the lottery thing didn't happen. In other words, he actually owes me a debt of gratitude! -- but he's too lunk-headed to understand that.

Like an artist who is penniless and unrecognized in his lifetime, sometimes vindication comes too late, but it always comes to the pure of heart and steady of spirit. As I said, I never felt stupid until I joined these motorcycle groups! Of course, I join because I like the BIKES -- it's pretty hard to like most of the members, given my penchant for expressing myself honestly, as a free-thinking individualist. We know what happens to people who do that -- Golgatha!

Shucks, I'll just have to keep slogging along with my nine ugly old pre-DeTomaso Benellis, and struggle to make sense of things with my pathetic 188 IQ and second-rate Ivy League Education!!!

And you know, in the final analysis, there's only one possible response when people think you're an asshole -- "Fuck 'Em!"

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

SS

de TOMASO: GRANDIOSE, NOT GREAT

Kjell,

Are you denying that Benelli copied the engine from the popular Honda design, down to every last dimension, and changed only what they needed to change to stuff the thing into whatever frame they were trying to hang it on, or put it into?

I have the Benelli Sei book with all the period test reviews, every single one of them refers to the fact that they lifted the design WHOLESALE from Honda. It was usually in the first or second paragraph, in fact. We all know it. DeTomaso copped to it. So why deny it?

I knew exactly what a real Moto Guzzi engine looked like before I joined (and left) the group, and you know, funny thing, it's exactly what a Guzzi engine looks like today: two big air cooled cylinders, horizontally-opposed or 45-Degrees or whatever it is. It's a thoroughbred design, it's the heritage and the history, it's pure and real Guzzi, it's the only thing that survived, because it was the only thing that was really any damn good and the only thing (I'm sure the smart folks at Piaggio picked up on this) WORTH PRESERVING. It's that wacky Darwin again!

"If I wanted a Honda, I'd have bought a Honda." See picture of Mr. Prampolini below, a real Italian engineer designing a real Italian engine in-house -- not stealing blueprints from Honda!!!

Regarding my decision to leave the group, one must (as my girlfriend says) "go where your market is." As a moderator, I get two or three people leaving the group PER DAY (you don't hear about these folks; I do) because you guys won't stop lavishing praise on your damn multis and ignoring every other Benelli ever made. My love for real pre-Tomaso Benellis from Pesaro (not by way of Tokyo) is an antidote to this illness. Since you all HAVE these bikes and since you all spend your days worshipping them, it's just externalized self-love, in my opinion. See earlier blog posts for my uncensored take on this phenomenon!

Also, if you go back into the archives, you will see that I have been more or less ruthlessly attacked by people, often people with a complete disregard and lack of understanding of what I was saying. The "LINE" that people have crossed can be expressed thusly: I have never once attacked anyone on the forum, merely bikes and designs I didn't like. I never made things personal. Such comments are always offline and private and personal between me and the correspondent; one creep from the U.K. posted them publicly, a breach of the most basic e-mail etiquette and privacy, but after all, his only goal was to paint me black in the eyes of the group, not play fair or act decently. I have the right to my private opinions, however unflattering of others, and I have the right not to see these private opinions posted publicly!

All this, in essence, is why I left the group -- poor behavior and ignorance on the part of the participants. I'll continue to read the posts to make sure I don't miss anything interesting or useful (unless, as moderator, I choose to throw myself out of the group, ha-ha!), but I wouldn't dare contribute a word, for fear of being mocked and attacked, and to not commit the biblical error of pearls and swine.

Besides, this blog is a fine opportunity to say whatever I damn well please. After all, there may be a connection between "The DeTomaso" mentality (bigger is better, my engine is bigger than yours, therefore my [you know] must be bigger, too…) and charlatanism (the bikes weren't that great, nor were his cars, they were all flash, grandiose but not great).

DeTomaso was very wealthy, and very successful, but he was also very short. Can you say NAPOLEON? Sure you can….however much fun they ultimately end up having, successful men who become successful with girls only after they have their financial success must carry around with them a dirty, shameful little secret: if I was really attractive and desirable, why didn't girls want me BEFORE my success? Ask Pete Townshend with his big nose, or DiTomaso with his dimunitive stature, or countless "just plain pug-ugly" millionaires!!!

There were many errors of thought and expression in your letter. I won't address them all. The Japanese copying Benelli and Guzzi engines? You are dreaming. Honda not suing Benelli as evidence of non-copying of the engine design? Hardly! 1) There may have been a licensing agreement in place, unknown to us -- some of the early articles stated that there was, and/or 2) Benelli had no significant money to chase down, so why bother? That's the first thing the lawyers look at -- how big is the potential booty?

Benelli's sales numbers were insignficant and so was the revenue stream. The canny Weiss/Wise family dropped them like a hot potato as soon as there was a good excuse -- the lousy transmission design. Which was lousy, some say, because it was (HERE WE GO AGAIN!) a copy of the Honda design, which was made for the 500, and didn't have the strength to handle the 750's extra two cylinders, torque, and power!!!

Right! You can see that lack of originality and creativity has its technical and (ultimately) sales consequences!

As for DeTomaso "saving" Benelli, it's much like "selling the farm" or "killing the goose that laid the golden egg" or spending your last dollar on a small packet of drugs. You get the initial cash boost, it feels good, but you've signed your death warrant, even if it takes a few years for the executors to knock on the door....

Thanks for your kindness and sincerity,

Over and Out,


SS

HAVE BONNIE WILL TRAVEL

So I sold my 1974 Benelli Tornado 650S (weeping and gnashing of teeth!) and bought a 2008 Triumph Bonneville T100 with lots of cool accessories. Here is a picture of my Triumphant (pun intended) departure from Denver. Drove the bike down to Santa Fe in one day, a bit chilly but I was well-wrapped up so not unmangeable. Bike ran nicely. Too Much Fun, love these motorcycle adventures!

The Tornado will adorn an Attorney's Office (Terrific Conversation Piece!!!) for the winter, and then, after some very minor repairs and tune-up work, will take to the roads again...

Selling The Tornado was a wrench and I hope someday to acquire another one.

JE ACCUSE!

Sean,

Who said I was a class act? Certainly not the members of this group!!!!

"I am what I am" is a better way of putting it.

I am off the group totally and what I do on my blog is, for sure, my own business! And I have the right to my own opinions, be they the dubious character of the Benelli Multis, or the dubious character of most of the Yahoo Benelli Forum Group.

I am DESPERATELY seeking a new moderator so I can bail, would you like to volunteer? It's REALLY EASY.

I trust such morning revelations as being divine inspiration or something close.

Here I was, anguished and confused about the group, and how they have continually mocked, ignored, or denigrated my opinions and postings since DAY ONE.

After I realized what was going on, I understood all and felt much better. Hell, as a Christian Boy, I'll even forgive 'em! But it doesn't mean I want any part of it, not one little bit.

I'm totally clear on it.

SS

CIRCLE JERKS!

I had to leave the Yahoo Benelli Forum last night, tired of being ignored and attacked. Buncha Losers! In the delicious half-sleep state this morning (which also, sometimes, brings the gift of visions and revelations) the phrase "circle jerk" came to mind: The Benelli Yahoo Group is a circle jerk!

Now what is that? Here's what the dictionary says:

"A Circle Jerk"

1.) When a group of males sit in a circle, jerking each other off.

2.) *NOT* when a group of males stand in a circle to jerk off onto a cookie or anything of the sort. That retarded frat game is called "Limp Biscuit"... which kind of indirectly explains why the band of the same namesake is so fucking horrible.

3.) When a bunch of blowhards - usually politicians - get together for a debate but usually end up agreeing with each other's viewpoints to the point of redundancy, stroking each other's egos as if they were extensions of their genitals (ergo, the mastubatory insinuation). Basically, it's what happens when the choir preaches to itself.

Well, number 3 sounds about right!